SORRY

I haven't been updating this in the longest time! and I'm sorry! I've been drawn back to tumblr.  If you don't have my link to my new page its
tellytothe.tumblr.com

[:

I don't watch the filipino channel much, but I do have a thing for Gerald Anderson

oh my goodness, this picture was taken 2years ago

It's crazy how we don't even look like this anymore, it's weird.  How time goes by so fast.  AND WTHECK AM I WEARING?? :O

Be fearless about life

I want to take life head on, without any fear.  Just to constantly move forward and never look back.  I don’t think life is here to scare us.  Life is a lesson, everyday is something new. Life is a mix of everything, the people we encounter, the unstable emotions we deal with, the places we go-life is everything on day to day basis.

Sometimes we fell held back by people and by “things”- that life’s too hard or we say life isn’t fair….well you’re right it isn’t and it never will be.  We just have to accept that. How are we going to progress as a person if we aren’t able to look life right in it’s eye and accept it’s challenges.  Theres no way that I’m going to let anyone of anything scare me into thinking that life is there to hold be back, because I know it isn’t.  Life is another fuel to my fire, it’s another factor in my motivation.  How do you expect to get anywhere in life if your just going to be afraid, nothing gets done with someone who waits in fear.  Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams don’t wait for it to happen- be fearless about life.  Because one day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure its worth watching. As for me with life, I’m just warming up.

Lenibens 25'th bday@Disneyland.

I seriously love that girl! she is amazing [: and she's dating ian's cousin rayner who's like a kuya to me! so it goes hand in hand! These are some of my favorite people<3

Heartless, bitter, & ruthless

I've seen those very traits in me every so often.  It's kind of scary to even feel those ways, but at the same time I'm not surprised.  Everyone can be heartless, bitter and ruthless..some just choose not to be.  As for me, I choose not to be but I see it come out from time to time.  Sometimes it's triggered by uncontrolled  frustration or anger.  I really don't know the exact reasons.  I can be so nonchalant too, it's really ridiculous quite frankly.  I kind of amaze myself (not in a god way) but more in a curious way.  Just the way I react towards other people and their vibes catches me off guard sometimes-especially when smart ass remarks leave my mouth.  I suppose it's just part of who I am.  And I have no shame, I have faults-I just have no problem recognizing them and voicing them out to the public.  At least you know what you're dealing with if you really piss me off.  Or if you just catch me on a bad day.  So please brace yourself & just bear with me.

I see God working in my boyfriends life and it's amazing to see and experience with him

Bad weather

I woke up today, I looked out my window and it was beautiful outside It was warm but with a slight breeze.  So according to the weather that I saw I assumed that the rest of the day was going to stay about the same.  Since the past couple of days have been immensely hot -___- I decided to wear cropped distressed jean shorts, a woven top from 21, and cute sandals.  I went to school was in class(es) from 12:30-5:45  I had my occasional breaks during my 2classes, I'd take my 10min break outside and the weather still seemed nice.  But once 5:45 hit and I got out........I was in complete shock! the clear blue sky, the warmth of the sun and the cool breeze was gone! :O <--my face literally looked like that for about 5minutes.   It was a disaster outside!!!!! the sky was covered in gray and maroon with hazy clouds, The mountains that I saw before class disappeared behind the fog of the clouds, the winds were blowing like crazy and it was freaking cold up the ying yang! I looked like a complete idiot standing there like I was ready to go to the beach.  I swear the trees looked like they were about to tip over, dust and other debris were being blown everywhere...I felt like I was going to be carried into the wind -___- dude it was soo scary.  It seriously looked like the world was going to end *knocks on wood* but it seems like everything calmed down now.  I just hope tomorrow won't be another replay of today.  And just in case I am going to wear pants and a sweater! :D

And she always has to come home all mad.....common mom, RELAX

I love nikki desuasido, she's so pretty!

Dear world, I have man..

Ian and I haven been together for 2years, I know its not as long as most but it is significant to me.  There are days like today where I can't help but sit and reminisce about how things use to be.  How we met, what he was wearing when he first hugged me, how he smelled, his first text, our first late night conversation, our first date, the first time we kissed, the night he mad it official.....the list just goes on.  It kind of makes me tear up...just thinking about everything we've been through, and it just amazes me.  I never would have thought we would make it this far, especially because of certain things that happened.  We had our months where everything got in between us, where things and people just got in the way.  I knew what it was like before to love someone, but the feelings I have toward the man that stands before me today is no where close to this "love" I felt before.  It's this type of feeling when I lay down in bed and when Ian comes to mind, I ball up and start to giggle to myself, as crazy as that may sound I only do that because the thought of him makes me happy.

His scent lingers through my room, his presence.  I look at my boyfriend sometimes- he thinks I'm day dreaming but little does he know I'm just admiring his facial features, his movements, the way his brown eyes lay so soft on the things he watches.  His touch is soft and gentle, but he holds me close with strong reassurance.  I see God working in his life, I've seen this boy become a man.  Ian grows more beautiful and handsome in my eyes everyday. And I am so blessed, I am not immune to this thing called love.  It has entangled me in its aura.

Growing with this man side by side as partners as equals has been such a journey.  So many bumps and forks in the road.  But we've made it this far.  I hope it continues....Dear world, I am blessed with a man so good though there are days where we don't get along...but even then nothing else matters but him & I....I love you Iankrystian.

Yours truly,
your girlfriend-telly <3

Just some of the main things I ordered aside from my brush set. I'm too lazy to post everything else.  I finally got to go online shopping after like 6months without shopping period.  So it was nice to get some stuff for myself.

Costal 88 warm, shimmer and matte palette. Synthetic Buffer Brush Large, YSL mascara, 187 Duo fibre brush, and Mac brush cleanser

A new day


Theres nothing better then waking up every morning knowing that God gave me another day to live.  Another day to make memorable.  I know life is short and I want to make sure I'm doing what I can to live up to the standards of what life should be.  I really don't want any "shoulda coulda woulda's" in my lifetime.  It's just an amazing gift that we all have. Everything I didn't do yesterday I can do today.  I want to make that everyone that is close to me knows how much I care and how appreciative I am.  I don't want to waste my precious time on insignificant people that amount to nothing of importance in my life.  Theres just no time for haters, I let them do their job.  My days can only be focused toward the good people and good vibes.  I want to enjoy my life while I have it, and I'm not going to let anyone get in the way of that.

To:Ateh Jess

"DO YOU WANT ME TO JUDO CHOP HER?!"
haha ateh jess should get it [:

ONLINE ORDERS!

Come in either tuesday or wednesday and I'm so excited.  You guys already know I went crazy with my online shopping for my makeup and brushes and their finally arriving this week.  But the thing is I wont be home neither tues. or wed I'm going to be at school :( so now I'm kind of panicking because my parents wont be home either & I don't want to make ian stay at my house to just wait for my packages.  So now I'm trying to figure out if the Fedex man is going to leave my stuff at the local post office. Does anyone know what happens when you're not home to receive the package?? please leave a comment if you know. Thank you in advance <3

My little cousin Dayday-His 2nd bday

Mom...

I’ve prayed to God to change her but no changes have effected my mother.  None that I can see or notice.  I don’t even feel the need to call her my “mom” but it’s become a habbit.  She’s coniving, bitter, codescending, over powering, dictatorial , “im always right” type of woman.  She does things for our family, not because she wants to, but because SHE NEEDS TO.  She doesn’t get any type of gratification out of doing it.  I’ll admit she’s the one getting our family by, but day after day after day she comes home bitching, complaining, throwing out inessential things to make us (my dad and I) feel bad.  In all honesty she makes us feel like SHIT.  WHAT MOTHER/WIFE DOES THAT?  Her moods are biopolor and she can snap any minute.  Everyone tells me-“shes your mom, you have to respect her and just understand”- NO-there’s NOTHING for me to understand, I GET IT.  No one will EVER know nor understand half of the story that involves my mother.  She believes that SHES ALWAYS RIGHT, there are no if’s and’s or butts.  She likes to compare us. “why can’t you be like your cousin? she’s going to ucla! but you? your probably not even going to school you’re probably just wasting my money” She does it a lot, espically with my dad-too make him feel bad……..on purpose

That woman knows exactly what to say and when to say it. “THAT THING” the exact words to push your buttons. And she pushes those buttons everyday of my life. The good days with her are rare. They may only last for 10mintues before she transforms into the hulk on PMS x’s infinity. I kid you not her switch is constanly left on BITCH MODE. And her mouth ceases to talk constant negative things. What I highly dislike about her…she hovers. She always says something quote on quote IN-ENTENSIONALLY RUDE AND UNECESSARY to someone else. BUT she says it loud enough for you to hear knowing shes implying all those “rude and unecessary” things are about you. Then my dad..the poor sap he can be sometimes, he likes to jump onto her bandwagon of terror and joins her in her constant verbal whiplash. I know he only does it [not to make me mad on purpose] but to show that he can be on HER SIDE as well. Cus thats one thing my mother hates, she assumes my dad only vouches for me, which is totally TRUE. haha. What can I say, I’m a daddy’s girl. HONESTLY THOUGH, I feel like i’m in a NIGHTMARE.. I wish I could lay in bed throw my covers over my head and wake up in a completely different life. Where my MOTHER WAS LOVING and not soo cynical. but whatevs…this is my life..Gotta deal I guess..but DAMN my mother needs to chill…but she wont..

AND SHE NEVER WILL…

I hope when I grow up, if I ever have children that I wont treat them the way my mother treats me…I don’t want them “wishing i never had a mom like that” I want my kids to me proud of me, I want them to be like “i have the best mom ever”  I want to do things for my kids because I want to, out of love, not because I have too. I WANT THEM TO FEEL LOVED- I don’t want to grow up to be like MY MOM.

Ps:I can’t say im not grateful for the things she has done for our family, the rare happy moments thrown in every now and then in between the harsh reality of our lifes.  She can be a great mom, i’ve seen it every blue moon.  But it’s dwindled away..she is who she is…and theres not point in trying to change thatanymore :’(

like mother like daughter...SIKE.

I know I always talk about having respect for your parents no matter how bad the situation may get blah blah blah blah blah.  Well I take everything I said back.  I have no right to say those things, because I don't know how bad other kids have it with their parents.  Some probably have it so bad that they have reason's to despise their parents.  I would be considered as those "some".  I despise my mother to the utmost, I've had those feelings as long as I can remember.  They have been repressed for the longest, but now I just find myself exploding.  

I'm not going to beat around the bush, I HATE MY MOTHER.  YES I SAID IT.  And before you make any type of judgement against me you better know the story behind my anger.  And if you don't, you can take all your "thats fucked up she said that, you shouldn't disrespect your parent's" critiques and shove it up your ass.  And if you think I'm saying that part out of "my anger" you are strongly mistaken.  I don't expect anyone to really understand, I mean who really would?.. and I mean completely understand? anyways...

I am so fed up it's ridiculous -___- my head is pulsing..I've never been so mad. aht;oahtg;hanglah;hya;wht;wht!!!!!!

I've never been pushed so far in my life. And I would never have expected it from my own mother.....lets hope it gets better from here....Keep me in your prayers guys.

typical high school bitches

It's so annoying how they portrait these "highschool cliques" on tv, movies etc.  It's getting really monotonous and annoying.  Of course they have popular mean girls, the in-betweens, the outcasts, the freaks, the gangsters the wannabe gangsters, the jocks..etc and the list can go on and on.  Theres no originality to it these days, and its unbelievably predictable.  I'm currently watching this "My super sweet 16" the movie on MTV, they made it into some horror flick and that movie aside from mean girls is a perfect example of these "social groups" in high school.  I can't help but roll my eyes.

From:Ateh Jess

I Love my sister, I wanted my own personal note so I begged her to write me one.  And low and behold I got it! She has nice handwriting doesn't she? Better than most I have to say.  Actually that's the best I've seen in the longest time. But this woman is amazing and she is immensely inspirational.  I couldn't have asked for a better friend/ateh.  It's crazy how we have common bonds and the same anniversary date..October 21st Who would have thought that a short period of  time would have brought us this close?  Trust me if you ever get to encounter her in your life you wont regret it.  She will be there for you hands down.  I remember on tumblr she would post these food posts! OH MY JEEBUS!! it made my mouth water and my tummy grumble.  hahaha But anyways.... I love you ateh! thank you for being there for me since the beginning.  I am blessed to have you as my sister [:
LOVES YOU LOTS!
-zee babysister

LOOK WHAT I FREAKIN ORDERED :O

MAKE UP FREENZY!

I'm literally on 5different makeup pages and I'm ordering like crazy. -___- CRAP. Shopping online is worse than shopping directly in the store. Especially because I'm in the comfort of my own home so I'm just sitting here taking my damn time. AND NO RUSH! YAY [:

• new set of 13makeup brushes
• makeup brush cleaner
• mineral poweder
• acne serum
• costal 88 makeup palettes
• urban decay eye shadow
• ben nye palettes

and the list goes on....those are just the generics. I have gone crazy with all this, but I can't help it. I've been in dier need of new makeup "equipment" girls know what I mean. lol

I believe in what I believe in, I don't let anyone tell me otherwise

I'M BACK

I GAVE UP ON TUMBLR

...WELL FOR NOW....

And now I'm back here (: feels good. I GAVE UP ON TUMBLR....FOR NOW..I felt like I had better ability to write my thoughts and feelings here without having to see if someone clicked the infamous "heart" and "reblog" button. Tumblarity made no sense, it fluctuated like crazy. I don't know, it was fun while it lasted but I rather be here I guess. We'll see if my hiatus on tumblr will be shortened by my addiction toward it. Hopefully not. But I know I can always count on blogspot to keep me away from unnecessary naked pictures and bullshit posts. haha AND my favorite part of all THIS SITE HAS A COMMENT BOX!! [: